Shipping Policy
Fast, reliable, and occasionally whimsical.
Updated as of September 17, 2025
Shop Smart, Stay on Grampa's Good Side
We love having you here, but let's keep things simple. Browse, pick what you like, and place your order without turning it into a soap opera. No fake accounts, no prank orders, and no “accidental” purchases you didn't mean to make. We're too old for games — unless it's bingo.
Prices Aren't Up for Debate
We work hard to keep our prices fair, so no haggling, no “back in my day it was cheaper” speeches, and no trying to sneak in expired coupons. What you see is what you pay — and trust us, it's still a better deal than most of what's out there.
Payment First, Packages Later
We ship your order once payment clears — not before, not during, and definitely not “on a handshake.” We accept the usual payment methods, and we keep your details safe (safer than Grampa's cookie jar). Once the money's in, we get to work packing your goodies.
We Move Fast… But Not Faster Than Life
We'll do our best to get your order out quickly, but sometimes life throws curveballs — weather, holidays, or the occasional nap. If there's a delay, we'll let you know. Just remember, good things (and great products) are worth the wait.